a good day for soup

This is one of those days when you don't make your bed because it's all gray and rainy and you just want to get wrapped up in blankets and drink hot cocoa and have soup and grilled cheese. There's just something about soup and hot cocoa and grilled cheese that makes an unmade bed kind of delightful.

this is beauty

Go to http://mingmakescupcakes.yolasite.com/ for more mouth-watering recipes. I think I am in LOOOOOOOOVVVVVE!!!!!!!

gym showers are gross

I took my first gym shower yesterday.

I know, I know, I was all like "THAT'SSOGROSSIWILLNEVERDOTHAT", but I had to babysit right after class, and I didn't want to have to go back, so after a little hyperventilating, I decided it just made more sense to shower and get ready there.

Not being at all sure of the proper protocol, it took me a little time to figure out what to bring. Blow dryer? Makeup? Have a vanity table delivered?

By the time I was done with my workout, I had spent an hour giving myself a pep-talk. You can do this. You can shower in the same room as other people. It probably won't be weird. Stop thinking about the shower scene in Carrie. I bet those stories about fungal infections are just old wives tales.

Honestly, I wanted nothing so much as to stop someone, some well meaning girl, and tell her I am a gym shower newbie and ask for advice. I kept waiting for the right moment, but everyone was kinda not dressed. Call me old fashioned, but I like people I introduce myself to to have a shirt on.

I wasn't sure if the whole disrobing thing happened before or after entering the shower area, so I erred on the side of modesty and trotted into the dimly lit, shower-head lined room in my full workout regalia only there wasn't anywhere to put my clothes so then I tried to play it cool and was like "oh, good, I was really hoping I could rinse out my gym clothes. Two birds with one stone, know what I mean?"

And I took the fastest shower ever. Really, I think I showered so fast that I actually went back in time. And then I raced back to my locker, where I would gladly have changed inside my locker, were that possible.

This is not something I would like to repeat. Although I do feel a certain sense of accomplishment.

it turns out i have some gym issues

Okay, so yesterday I met with the angel who is helping me get healthy and who I will hereafter refer to as Trainy Trainerson. Hmmmm. That sounds kinda like "tranny". And that's not good. Mental note: consider other possible nicknames for Sarah.

Right. Well.

She came over and gave me homework for the rest of the week. Which meant going to the gym. And after today I realize, I am kind of needing some help with the whole gym etiquette thing.

See, I went to the gym, and I ran on the treadmill and ellipted on the elliptical machine, but when I was finished I was all dripping with sweat and stuff, which I have heard is common following ellipting.

So, uh, what do you do then? I mean, do you change there? Do you shower before you leave? I am having flashbacks to junior high PE. What if people make fun of my bra? I peeked in the showers and it looked really, uh....not private.

Should I not tell you that I didn't shower and instead I rode the subway all tomato-red and stinky? It turns out I am somewhat neurotic when I ellipt.

My lack of gym finesse is embarrassing.

found

One hot-pink plastic cell phone. Heart on the cover. Rings when opened. Had been covertly dropped in my purse. Suspect's name: Olive. Could have been her friend, though. She had the shifty eyes.

Olive, if you're reading this, (and I will be SO impressed if you are) I have your phone. Call to coordinate exchange. Will accept hug as payment.

Olive, if it isn't yours, pass this message along to your friends. You know who they are. They're the cute ones who hold me hostage for two hours each Sunday.

Hug as payment still applies.

i immediately regret this decision

I have, yet again, reached a decision to make a concerted attempt at healthy living.

I know. I'm not sure I can do it either.

Maybe it's because spring has begun to make itself known. Maybe it's because you can only eat so many crackers with Easy Cheez before your body starts to protest. Maybe it's because IVF kindly bestowed an extra fifteen pounds on my frame. Either way, I feel the need to be healthy.

I made this decision a few weeks ago. It's not the first time I've gotten the itch to get healthy. The first time it happened was in seventh grade when I decided to eat vegetables because I wanted some increased poundage in the chestal area. My resolve lasted a full six hours, until Mom served peas at dinner, at which point I determined that being a Juniors 32AA wasn't so bad, after all.

The last time I tried to be healthy was last year, when I decided to swear off sweets for a full month. My attempt was in no way a success. I think I made it four days before I started calling chocolate chips healthy, and my slippery slope only got slipperier from there.

So, maybe that was a little too hard-core. This time, though, is different. For reals. I've enlisted the help of this adorable girl in our ward at church who looks like a pocket-sized super-model. She's coming over tonight to take measurements (yikesy!) and take a look at my work-out equipment, after which she will come up with a plan to which I will attempt to comply.

I'm excited. Also maybe a little apprehensive. Also maybe eating all the junk food in our apartment so she won't make me throw it out. Maybe.

I hope I'm ready for this.

the human diet

Andrea: Dr. Oz says you should only eat meat that walks on four legs once a week. And you can eat meat that walks on two legs all the rest of the time.

Paul: So I can eat all the humans I want?