i heart hockey

So, remember when I didn't like hockey because of all the violence and brutality?

Did I mention I also think it's awesome?

Probably not, because I didn't know until Friday, when a couple of our greatgreat friends took us to the Princeton-Cornell hockey game, JUST HOW MIND BLOWINGLY SA-WEET it is.

Mind you, this whole hockey love thing came as a complete shock to me. I mean, when P-Dog watches football, sure I might look like I'm paying attention, but actually I'm picking out the names of our future children. Live baseball games are fun as long as I have someone there for me to share my innermost thoughts and feelings with, and golf is completely delightful if I want a nap. Those announcer people have the most soothing voices.....

So, I had no plans whatsoever to actually watch the hockey game.

Until we entered the rink, and I was overcome with this feeling of.....dare I say....excitement? Yes! I think it was excitement! And know what? All that violence and brutality I've always associated with hockey actually makes for a very entertaining live game.

Also, hockey has the BEST sports jargon. You may ask, how do I know this, seeing as I am the one napping during golf. I am not offended. I know this because I totally just googled hockey terms and came up with a whole list of them and thought.......

ANOTHER REASON I LOVE HOCKEY!!!!!

Biscuit in the basket? Guess what that means?? Go ahead, guess!! It means scoring a goal!! Tell me that's not adorable.

Deke- This means fooling an opponent to move out of position. I think this would also make an excellent celebrity baby name.

Meat wagon- a player whose only skill is fighting. Um.......HILARIOUS. I'm putting this on my list of favorite insults that I will use only in jest because I'm not about hurting feelings.

Sin bin- the penalty box. Parents, I would submit this as an excellent title for the little one's time-out location. "Deke, you're being a meat wagon. Time to go to the sin bin."

I'll tell you what- if loving a sport for its silly jargon and fast paced brutality is wrong, well, I don't want to be right.

i raise my goblet of rock.......to paul

Please, raise your goblet of rock, and join me in wishing Paul a very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

Fact: Rush is Paul's favorite band in the whole world.

Fact: The album 2112 came out the year of Paul's birth. I site this as further evidence that he rocks.

Fact: I feel like there is an I Love Lucy episode for every situation in life. Paul feels like there is a Rush song for every situation in life. Remind me to ask him to explain Xanadu one more time.

Fact: Paul does not like birthdays. I am hoping that in posting a song by his most favorite band of all time, he will stop associating birthdays with menacing clowns, and instead associate birthdays with the most rocking band in the universe and let me throw him a huge party with balloons. Also lots of Diet Coke.

an official memo

Email received from one, Paul Boerem, 5:35 p.m:

Official MEMO.

Paul is the BOSS.

All are to do what he says.

He is the final authority on all matters of official and non official business.

Again, urgent.... Paul is the boss, he has always been the boss and he will continue to always be the boss.

This MEMO is now complete. Thanks for your help in this matter.

The BOSS
Paul David Boerem

putting our hat in the ring

"I looked in to adoption benefits at my work."

That's what Paul said when I called him at lunch a few weeks ago.

"Wow! Okay, you're feeling good about this?" I'm trying to keep my voice from doing cartwheels.

"Yeah, I feel good. Let's get this thing started!"

Okay, he's got cartwheel voice going on, too. I hang up the phone.

And grin.

A feeling washes over me, a feeling sort of like the first time I had grape soda, standing in Albertson's with my dad. Only this is a fizzy warm feeling, and the soda was fizzy and cold, but that's beside the point.

The point is, we're going to adopt a baby.

Yessssssss.

I have lots of thoughts and feelings. I'll talk about them later. Right now I'm just going with the warm fizzy.

I felt like the Yip Yips, my childhood friends from Sesame Street, capture my feelings best in their classic song. Enjoy!

a longing for the unattainable

I have a thing for Paul's belly button.

Don't ask me why, but for some inexplicable reason, I find it irresistible. I simply must touch it. I don't want to tickle it, mind you. My intentions are completely honorable. Sort of. All I want is to rest my index finger nicely over it.

I know. Weird, right?

Paul doesn't like it. I can't imagine why. Who on earth wouldn't love having their belly button accosted by a loving (and slightly quirky) wife?

Well, over the years Paul has kind of gotten wise to me. He'll see my adoring sideways glance in the general direction of his belly, and catapult himself to the other side of the room. This should probably hurt my feelings, or maybe I should think hey, Paul doesn't like this so how about rubbing his back instead, but really it just motivates me.

Today, for example. We're in the office/kitty palace, and he's about to leave for the store. I really, really want to touch that charming belly button, but I know I have to be stealthy about it, so I sidle up all cute like, and then look at the hem of his t-shirt. I get a concerned look on my face, and say hey, let me just check something here.....

"ANDREA BOEREM STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!!!!"

"What? What do you mean?" I bite my lip for some extra cuteness. It doesn't work.

"YOU KNOW I HATE THAT!!!! I SWEAR TO YOU, ANDREA BOEREM-"

I make my eyes all big and innocent. "What? What do you swear?"

"I SWEAR IF YOU TOUCH MY BELLY BUTTON, I WILL PIN YOU DOWN AND GIVE YOU THE WORST RASPBERRY PINKBELLY NOOGIE OF YOUR LIFE!!!! OF YOUR LIFE!!!!!"

I think he's bluffing.

i guess seven is a really really good number

Overheard on the subway ( please picture a smallish gent decked out stylishly, speaking to an equally stylish fellow):

"I know the market is bad right now, but I would really like to buy a house, so I can have many cats. I would like to have maybe four, five, no, seven cats. Seven cats. Seven is a sacred number, right? I want a black cat, with green eyes."

Okay, then.

seven is a good number

I've been tagged by my BFF redstarmama.

She's pretty much one of my favorite people ever. Just in case you were wondering. Here's the part where I answer the questions.

7 Things I Plan to Do Before I Die

1. Get a Bachelor's Degree (aiming high)
2. Go jogging (aiming low)
3. Have a child. Maybe I should have put that before jogging. Also I'd like that to be well before I die, if that's possible. I'm not looking to break Sarah's record.
4. Learn to sew. And knit. I want to make aprons, and knit a scarf. Perhaps many scarves.
5. Voluntarily eat vegetables (this is before I die. nobody hold their breath, okay?)
6. Have a dishwasher. And a garbage disposal. Too greedy? Dang.
7. Go shopping one time and buy whatever I want, regardless of the price. (Is that more a dream than a plan?) - this was last on redstarmama's list, and I kinda like it. I'm leaving it right there.

7 Things I Do Now

1. Complain about physics
2. Talk about going jogging
3. Love Paul like there's no tomorrow. You there, Paul? I love you, dude.
4. Go to church/read scriptures/LOVE IT!!!
5. Bake stuff, and then take it to people because if it's here, that's ALL I WILL EAT.
6. Laugh
7. Love New York/miss my family

7 Things I Can't Do

1. Eat vegetables
2. Or fruit
3. Or want to
4. Stop thinking about candy?
5. Stop wanting chocolate chip cookies for breakfast?
6. Leave the last brownie in the pan
7. Or want to

7 Things That Attract Me To The Opposite Sex (Paul)

1. That little gap in between his front teeth
2. He has this angelic curl that falls over his forehead when he sleeps. I wish I slept cute.
3. He prays for us to have a family. I'm kind of in love with that.
4. Two words: bi-ceps.
5. Um, you've seen some of the stuff he says. Hi-larious.
6. He works hard, which I love, and he wears scrubs while working hard, which I also love.
7. He's Paul. And he's mine.

7 Things That I Say Most Often

1. For reals.
2. Totally. I don't like that I use that word so much, but there it is.
3. NO TICKLE!!!!!
4. I heart you, Paul.
5. I'm thinking about going jogging.
6. Eeeeew, did you fart?
7. Nice burp.

7 Celebrities I Admire

1. Abigail Adams
2. Lucille Ball
3. I think all my favorite celebrities are dead.
4. I just looked on People's website at their list of celebs. Nothing.
5. I agree with redstarmama, James Earl Jones has got the Darth Vader thing going on.
6. How about celebs I don't like? That, I can do.
7. I'm going to wake up at three in the morning with a whole list. I just know it.

7 Favorite Foods (I will have no problem coming up with these...)

1. Deep fried Twinkie
2. Scharfenberger Nibby Bars. You're welcome, redstarmama.
3. Bacon
4. Potatoes
5. Cheese. Glorious cheese.
6. In N Out, number 2, ketchup only. Marry me.
7. Cereal

7 People Who Need To Do This

1. Justin
2. Meridth/Edward
3. Katie
4. Ryanne
5. Reagan
6. Tamara
7. Joe